Friday, April 22, 2011 :: Q...
I am working on one of my many software related projects.
I have been distracted with preparations for Easter dinner — we are having Pork Roast, Macaroni & Cheese, Candied Yams and Dressing– almost the meal I was was going to prepare for Christmas– except everyone went out of town Christmas day– for a funeral.
Today, I started on the dressing.
My mind has been filled with many thoughts today. For some reason– the guys at Rockwell. Recently, I saw a project on Freelancer.com that reminded me of John Newcomb– [certificate of deposit interest earnings widget that would be perfect for the empty area on the Business & Markets page]; this morning I checked Doug’s Facebook page– abstract clues made me think I had software issues [which had me checking all of my interfaces this morning to insure they all worked]; and Paul Chang and his two girlfriends.
In 1995, as the new year began and the EEOC investigation was reaching its climax I would often go home and listen to my music. This song by Luther VanDross was a favorite.
I rarely have time to feel sad or sorry for myself. Maybe the mistake with the Nano this week– made me pause for a minute. It made me realize how unreal this situation is.
Nothing can compare to what I went through with Rockwell. i was with them for just under 10 years. I knew most of those guys for the entire 10 years I was with Rockwell. I do not know if I can explain the emotional toll the EEOC process, plus the corporate psychological warfare, and my subsequent departure caused– but I can assure — nothing I have been through in the intervening years– can compare to that.
I had to figure out a lot of things that almost seem impossible. Things if I had not lived through this– I would not believe myself.
I want to explain to you what caused me emotional distress. My father’s death? It is different because there was nothing I could do about it. And even given what I have been through since, though horrific– is not as emotional to me– most likely because I have been analyzing why and not feeling sorry for myself.
The other day when I walked into Kohl’s– the first time, a pretty tall girl who reminded me of Sharon Foster looked at me and began laughing. She was behind the jewelry counter. I looked at her- smiled an inquisitive smile that was pure and continued on. I checked the mirror to see if my hair was all over the place because it was windy– and it was– but it did not look that bad– so I was still unsure what brought the laughter of the sales clerk. My feelings hurt?
No. My concern? Because the girl was attractive and may have been placed there just for me- I wonder if the other girl who actually worked there might be a little upset.
Have you ever seen photos of Mrs. Hopson? My mother? Even some of my family members? I like pretty people. Rude people bore me. You are much to pretty to be a bore.